Theirself or themself can be confusing because both forms appear in modern English, especially when writers try to use a singular they pronoun. If you’re wondering whether theirself or themself is correct, the answer depends on grammar rules, pronoun usage, and the context of the sentence.
Traditional English generally prefers themselves as the reflexive form of they, while themself is increasingly used with singular they. Theirself is much less common and is generally considered nonstandard in formal English.Understanding the difference between singular they, reflexive pronouns, possessive pronouns, and gender-neutral pronouns can help you choose the right word.
For example, “They prepared themselves” is standard when they refers to more than one person, while “They prepared themself” may be used when they refers to one person. However, style guides and dictionaries may differ in how they describe themself.In this guide, you’ll learn the meaning of theirself, meaning of themself, their correct usage, examples, and the difference between theirself vs themself. You’ll also discover which form is best for formal writing and everyday English.
Theirself or Themself: Quick Answer
Is “Theirself” Correct?
Theirself is a real English word, but that doesn’t make it the standard choice for formal American English.
Merriam-Webster defines theirself as a chiefly dialectal form of themself. Collins similarly describes it as a dialect form of themselves and marks it as nonstandard in American English.
For example:
“Anyone who says they aren’t worried is kidding theirself.”
A reader can understand the sentence immediately. However, theirself may sound unusual or nonstandard to many American English speakers.
In formal writing, it’s usually better to choose themself, themselves, or rewrite the sentence.
Is “Themself” Correct?
Themself has a legitimate grammatical use in contemporary English.
It functions as a reflexive pronoun when they refers to one person. Merriam-Webster specifically defines themself as a gender-neutral reflexive form used with singular they, including for a person whose gender isn’t specified or for someone who uses they/them pronouns.
For example:
- “Someone should be able to express themself.”
- “Each applicant can introduce themself.”
- “The student reminded themself to submit the form.”
- “Alex wanted to prove themself.”
Cambridge also recognizes this use, although its current dictionary entry labels themself “not standard.” It nevertheless gives examples involving a singular person and singular they.
That difference in dictionary labeling is important. It shows that dictionary treatment isn’t completely uniform, even though the word is clearly documented and increasingly used.
Which One Should You Use?
For most American English writing, the practical order is:
- Use themself when you specifically need a singular reflexive form with singular they.
- Use themselves when the reference is plural.
- Use themselves with singular they when your style guide or publication prefers that established form.
- Avoid theirself in formal edited writing unless you’re deliberately representing a dialect or a speaker’s wording.
- Rewrite the sentence if another construction sounds more natural.
For example:
“Each employee should remind themself about the deadline.”
This clearly refers to one employee.
For a group:
“The employees should remind themselves about the deadline.”
Here, themselves is the natural plural form.
What Does “Themself” Mean?
Definition of Themself
Themself is a reflexive pronoun formed from them + self.
Reflexive pronouns normally point back to the subject of a sentence. Compare:
- I → myself
- you → yourself
- he → himself
- she → herself
- it → itself
- we → ourselves
- they → themselves
The traditional pattern makes themself look unusual because they has historically been associated with the plural form themselves.
However, English speakers also use they as a singular pronoun.
For example:
“Someone left their phone on the table.”
The word someone refers to one person, but their avoids assuming whether that person is male or female.
Once singular they enters the sentence, the need for a singular reflexive form becomes easier to see:
“Someone should remind themself.”
The structure is parallel to:
“He should remind himself.”
and:
“She should remind herself.”
Merriam-Webster dates the first known use of themself to the 15th century. The word therefore isn’t a brand-new invention, even though its current use has attracted renewed attention.
Themself With Singular They
The most important modern use of themself occurs with singular they.
Consider this sentence:
“If a customer has a problem, they should contact support.”
Here, they refers to one customer whose identity isn’t specified.
Now add a reflexive action:
“If a customer has a problem, they should contact support rather than blame themself.”
The word themself points back to that same individual customer.
This makes the number distinction clear:
| Meaning | Example |
| One unspecified person | “Someone should look after themself.” |
| One person using they/them | “Jordan reminded themself to call.” |
| Several people | “The workers looked after themselves.” |
The important point is that singular they does not require the noun or pronoun to behave exactly like traditional singular he or she in every grammatical context. English already allows some pronouns to operate across different numbers.
The clearest example is you. English uses you for one person and multiple people:
“You are my friend.”
“You are my friends.”
The verb remains are in both cases.
Singular they works similarly in many modern constructions.
Themself vs Themselves
The difference between themself and themselves is primarily connected to number and usage.
Themselves is the established plural reflexive pronoun:
“The children prepared themselves for the trip.”
The children are plural, so themselves fits naturally.
Themself can identify one person:
“The child prepared themself for the trip.”
This is especially useful when the child’s gender isn’t specified or when the person uses singular they.
However, there’s an important wrinkle.
Themselves can also be used with singular they.
Merriam-Webster explicitly documents themselves with singular indefinite antecedents and notes that themself has increasingly been used as an alternative singular form.
That means both can appear in sentences such as:
“Someone should be proud of themselves.”
“Someone should be proud of themself.”
The first is more established in general English. The second makes the singular meaning more visible.
What Does “Theirself” Mean?
Definition of Theirself
Theirself is a reflexive form that exists in English but has a much less standard status.
Merriam-Webster defines it as chiefly dialectal and gives themself as the equivalent.
Dictionary.com labels theirself nonstandard and describes it as a singular, gender-neutral alternative to themselves, himself, or herself.
Collins gives the word an even broader historical picture. It records theirself as a dialect form of themselves and traces the word back to Middle English.
So theirself isn’t simply a spelling mistake.
It has a documented history.
The issue is that its historical existence doesn’t make it the preferred form in contemporary standard American English.
Why You May See Theirself
You may encounter theirself in several situations:
- Regional dialects
- Informal speech
- Historical writing
- Dialect representation in fiction
- Nonstandard English
- Individual speakers’ natural usage
- Informal online communication
For example:
“They need to learn to trust theirself.”
Most readers can understand the intended meaning immediately. Yet many editors would change it to:
“They need to learn to trust themself.”
or:
“They need to learn to trust themselves.”
The choice depends on the intended variety of English and the publication’s style.
Is Theirself Grammatically Wrong?
Calling theirself simply “wrong” misses an important distinction.
A word can be real but nonstandard.
English contains thousands of words and constructions that exist in regional dialects but don’t belong to formal standard English. That doesn’t mean speakers who use them aren’t communicating successfully.
The more useful question is:
Is theirself appropriate for this audience and context?
For a formal article, academic paper, business report, or edited website, theirself is usually best avoided.
For dialogue representing a particular dialect, however, changing every occurrence could remove an important feature of the speaker’s voice.
That’s the difference between grammatical description and style guidance.
A dictionary can record a form because people genuinely use it. An editor can still recommend a different form for formal writing.
Theirself vs Themself: Key Difference
Grammatical Function
Both words can serve a reflexive function.
The difference lies mainly in how standard contemporary English treats them.
Themself connects directly with the object form them:
them + self → themself
Theirself connects with the possessive form their:
their + self → theirself
That second construction exists historically and dialectally, but it isn’t the normal reflexive pattern in standard American English.
Compare the established forms:
- my → myself
- your → yourself
- him → himself
- her → herself
- them → themselves
This pattern helps explain why themself has a stronger grammatical connection to them.
Standard vs Nonstandard Usage
The most useful distinction is this:
| Word | Current status | Typical recommendation |
| themself | Established but still variable in style | Appropriate for singular they in many contexts |
| themselves | Standard and very common | Use for plural they and widely accepted with singular they |
| theirself | Nonstandard or dialectal | Usually avoid in formal US English |
Merriam-Webster recognizes both themself and theirself, but the labels are significantly different. It defines themself as a gender-neutral reflexive form used chiefly with singular they, while theirself is labeled chiefly dialectal.
Singular They and Reflexive Pronouns
The rise of themself makes more sense once singular they is understood.
English has used singular they for centuries. Merriam-Webster notes that singular they has been used since at least the late 1300s. Modern English has expanded its use, including for people whose gender is unknown and people who use they/them pronouns.
For example:
“If anyone calls, tell them I’ll be back.”
Nobody expects anyone to mean multiple people in this sentence. It refers to one unspecified person.
Now consider:
“If anyone calls, tell them to introduce themself.”
The reflexive form follows the same singular interpretation.
Modern grammar therefore has room for themself, even though themselves remains extremely common.
Theirself or Themself: Which Is Correct in American English?
For Formal Writing
When writing formal American English, theirself is usually not the best choice.
Instead, choose themself or themselves, depending on the context and style guide.
For example:
“Each participant should introduce themself before the discussion.”
This makes the singular reference explicit.
Another acceptable construction is:
“Each participant should introduce themselves before the discussion.”
This version remains widespread and is recognized in major usage guidance.
The MLA Style Center, for example, gives writers the choice of themselves or themself when a person uses singular they.
For Everyday Writing
Everyday English gives speakers more freedom.
You may hear:
“They need to take care of themself.”
You may also hear:
“They need to take care of themselves.”
And in some dialects:
“They need to take care of theirself.”
All three communicate the basic idea. They don’t carry the same level of standardness, though.
If you’re writing a text message to a friend, you probably don’t need to worry about a style manual.
If you’re writing a college paper, company website, or professional report, consistency matters much more.
For Academic and Professional Writing
Academic and professional writing benefits from predictable language.
If a style guide allows themself, use it consistently when singular they clearly refers to one person.
If the publication prefers themselves, follow that standard.
When neither option feels natural, rewrite the sentence.
For example:
“Each employee should make sure they complete the form themself.”
A cleaner version might be:
“Each employee should complete the form personally.”
Or:
“Every employee must complete the form.”
The last sentence removes the reflexive construction altogether.
Sometimes the best grammar solution isn’t choosing another pronoun. It’s removing the grammatical problem entirely.
Theirself or Themself Examples
Examples With Themself
Here are natural examples of themself referring to one person:
- “Someone should give themself time to recover.”
- “Each student should introduce themself.”
- “The applicant should ask themself whether the position is suitable.”
- “Anyone can challenge themself with a new skill.”
- “A person should be free to express themself.”
- “The reader can decide for themself.”
- “Each participant should remind themself of the rules.”
These examples use singular antecedents such as someone, each student, the applicant, anyone, and a person.
Examples With Theirself
Theirself can occur in dialectal or nonstandard English:
- “They need to look after theirself.”
- “Anyone can teach theirself a new skill.”
- “They should be honest with theirself.”
- “The person blamed theirself for the mistake.”
These sentences are understandable, but theirself isn’t the preferred standard form for formal American English.
A standard edited version would generally use themself, themselves, or a rewrite.
Correcting Common Sentences
| Less standard | Preferred alternative |
| “They should take care of theirself.” | “They should take care of themself.” |
| “Anyone can teach theirself.” | “Anyone can teach themself.” |
| “Each person should ask theirself why.” | “Each person should ask themself why.” |
| “The employees blamed themself.” | “The employees blamed themselves.” |
| “The student blamed themselves.” | “The student blamed themself.” |
| “The team members prepared themself.” | “The team members prepared themselves.” |
Notice that the correction isn’t always themself.
When the subject is genuinely plural, the correct reflexive form remains themselves.
Common Mistakes With Theirself and Themself
Using Theirself as the Standard Reflexive Form
One of the biggest problems is treating theirself as the normal reflexive counterpart of their.
English doesn’t normally form reflexive pronouns simply by adding -self to a possessive determiner.
For example:
- my → myself
- your → yourself
- her → herself
- our → ourselves
But with they, the established reflexive form is themselves, while themself has developed as a singular alternative.
Therefore:
“They blamed theirself.”
is generally less suitable for standard edited American English than:
“They blamed themself.”
Using Themselves for a Singular Person
This mistake is more complicated because themselves is not necessarily wrong with singular they.
For example:
“Someone should be proud of themselves.”
This construction is widely used and accepted.
Merriam-Webster explicitly documents themselves with indefinite singular antecedents and notes that singular themself has increasingly emerged as an alternative.
So don’t treat every singular themselves construction as a grammatical error.
The better distinction is:
- Plural they → themselves
- Singular they → themselves or themself, depending on usage and style
- Dialectal/nonstandard → theirself may occur
Confusing Their, Them, and Themself
These three forms have different jobs.
Their usually indicates possession:
“They brought their laptop.”
Them functions as an object pronoun:
“I called them yesterday.”
Themself is reflexive:
“They reminded themself to call.”
A quick test is to look at what the word is doing in the sentence.
| Word | Main function | Example |
| their | Possession | “They forgot their keys.” |
| them | Object | “I called them.” |
| theirs | Possessive pronoun | “The keys are theirs.” |
| themself | Singular reflexive | “They blamed themself.” |
| themselves | Plural reflexive / established singular use | “They blamed themselves.” |
Changing the Sentence Unnecessarily
Not every sentence needs a reflexive pronoun.
Consider:
“Each writer should ask themself whether the sentence is clear.”
That’s perfectly understandable.
But you could also write:
“Each writer should check whether the sentence is clear.”
The second version is shorter and may sound more natural.
Good writing isn’t about forcing a particular pronoun into every sentence. It’s about expressing the idea clearly.
Themself vs Themselves
Singular Reference
Use themself when you want to emphasize that singular they refers to one person:
“The applicant should prepare themself for the interview.”
The antecedent applicant is singular.
The sentence doesn’t identify the applicant as male or female.
Plural Reference
Use themselves when they refers to multiple people:
“The applicants should prepare themselves for the interviews.”
Here, applicants is plural.
The difference is straightforward:
One person → themself
Multiple people → themselves
This is a useful rule, but it isn’t the entire story because themselves also has a long-established role with singular indefinite antecedents.
Why Both Forms Can Appear With Singular They
English has never maintained a perfectly symmetrical pronoun system.
The modern pattern developed through actual usage rather than through a single planned grammatical rule.
Merriam-Webster explains that themself was used historically, became much less common as themselves became dominant, and has more recently gained use again alongside singular they.
This explains why you can encounter:
“Someone can decide for themselves.”
and:
“Someone can decide for themself.”
The first is more established.
The second highlights the singular meaning.
Neither sentence needs to be treated as incomprehensible or automatically erroneous.
Theirself vs Themself Comparison Table
| Feature | Themself | Themselves | Theirself |
| Basic role | Reflexive pronoun | Reflexive pronoun | Reflexive form |
| Singular person | Yes | Yes, in established usage | Yes, in some usage |
| Plural people | No | Yes | Sometimes dialectally |
| Standard American English | Increasingly recognized, but style varies | Strongly established | Generally nonstandard |
| Singular they | Common context | Also widely used | Possible in nonstandard/dialectal usage |
| Formal writing | Depends on style guide | Safest established option | Usually avoid |
| Dictionary status | Documented | Standard | Dialectal/nonstandard |
| Example | “They blamed themself.” | “They blamed themselves.” | “They blamed theirself.” |
Merriam-Webster’s current entries make the distinction especially clear: themself is defined as a gender-neutral reflexive form for a single person, while theirself is marked chiefly dialectal.
How to Choose the Right Form
Use Themself When Singular They Refers to One Person
If you’re intentionally using singular they and want a singular reflexive form, themself is the most direct choice.
“The person should remind themself to check the details.”
It mirrors:
“He should remind himself.”
and:
“She should remind herself.”
The construction is especially useful when you want to make the singular reference obvious.
Use Themselves for Plural They
When they refers to multiple people, use themselves.
“The students prepared themselves for the exam.”
Not:
“The students prepared themself.”
The plural form is firmly established.
Consider Rewriting for Maximum Clarity
Sometimes the easiest solution is to avoid the reflexive altogether.
Instead of:
“Each applicant should ask themself whether they meet the requirements.”
write:
“Each applicant should check whether they meet the requirements.”
Instead of:
“Someone needs to remind themself to save the document.”
write:
“Everyone should remember to save the document.”
These rewrites aren’t mandatory. They’re simply useful when a sentence feels clunky.
Theirself or Themself in Different Contexts
Text Messages and Social Media
Informal communication allows more variation.
You might see:
“They need to be true to themself.”
You may also encounter:
“They need to be true to theirself.”
The second version isn’t necessarily evidence that the writer doesn’t understand English. It may reflect regional, personal, or informal usage.
Still, if you’re trying to model standard American English, themself is the better choice between those two.
Emails and Workplace Communication
Workplace writing should favor clarity and consistency.
For example:
“Each employee should remind themself to complete the annual training.”
This is understandable, although some organizations may prefer:
“Each employee should remember to complete the annual training.”
If the company has a formal style guide, follow it.
Academic Writing
Academic writing requires greater attention to established conventions.
The MLA Style Center specifically recognizes singular they and gives themselves or themself as possible reflexive forms when referring to a person who uses singular they.
Therefore, academic writers shouldn’t automatically assume that singular they is grammatically unacceptable.
The important thing is consistency.
Grammar Articles and Dictionaries
Grammar resources may describe the forms differently because dictionaries have different editorial policies.
For example, Cambridge currently labels themself “not standard,” while Merriam-Webster includes it as a dictionary entry and describes its modern singular use.
That isn’t necessarily a contradiction.
Dictionaries can differ in how they label words based on frequency, editorial standards, historical usage, and current conventions.
The evidence does support one practical conclusion: themself is a documented English form with a specific modern use, while theirself has a much stronger dialectal or nonstandard association.
A Brief History of Themself and Theirself
The history of these words helps explain why the modern situation seems inconsistent.
Merriam-Webster records themself as dating to the 15th century. Its usage guide notes that themself was once used more broadly and was later largely eclipsed by themselves.
Interestingly, the historical record isn’t perfectly aligned with today’s grammar.
Merriam-Webster reports that themself was used for plural they centuries ago, while themselves eventually became dominant. It also cites historical examples of singular themself, including usage by writers such as Emily Dickinson.
Theirself has an even older documented history. Merriam-Webster gives its first known use as the 14th century, while Collins traces its origin to Middle English and identifies it as a dialect form.
This historical background matters because it disproves a common assumption:
Themself isn’t simply a newly invented internet word.
Its modern popularity has increased alongside the wider acceptance of singular they, but the form itself has a much longer history.
A Practical Case Study
Consider three sentences:
A student should remind themself to submit the assignment.
The students should remind themselves to submit the assignment.
A student should remind theirself to submit the assignment.
The first sentence uses themself for one student.
The second uses themselves for multiple students.
The third uses theirself, which is understandable but is generally considered nonstandard or dialectal in American English.
Now consider another sentence:
A student should remind themselves to submit the assignment.
This sentence may look inconsistent because student is singular and themselves looks plural. Yet singular they has long been used with themselves, and major dictionaries document that pattern.
This is why grammar discussions about themself vs themselves need more nuance than a simple “singular versus plural” rule.
Conclusion
When choosing between theirself or themself, themself is generally the better choice when you need a reflexive pronoun for singular they. Themselves remains the standard reflexive form of plural they and is also widely used with singular they. Theirself is uncommon and is usually avoided in standard formal English. Therefore, use themself when the context specifically calls for singular they, but use themselves when it fits naturally and follows the style you’re using.
FAQs
Is “theirself” a correct word?
Theirself appears in some varieties of English, but it is uncommon and generally considered nonstandard in formal English. In most situations, themself or themselves is preferable.
Is “themself” grammatically correct?
Yes. Themself can be used as a reflexive pronoun with singular they, particularly when referring to one person whose gender is unknown, unspecified, or when the person uses they/them pronouns.
Should I use “theirself” or “themself”?
In standard modern English, themself is generally the better choice when a singular they construction requires a reflexive pronoun.
Is “themselves” better than “themself”?
It depends on the context. Themselves is the traditional and widely accepted reflexive form of they, while themself can make it clear that they refers to one person.
What is the difference between “theirself” and “themself”?
Themself functions as a reflexive pronoun related to them, while theirself attempts to combine the possessive form their with self. Themself is much more established in modern standard usage.
Which is better for formal writing?
For formal writing, themselves is usually the safest choice. When specifically referring to one person with singular they, themself may be appropriate depending on the style guide and context.
